


Green Eyed Monster

by Tashilover



Category: In The Flesh
Genre: Character Study, dub-con
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-28
Updated: 2014-09-28
Packaged: 2018-02-19 01:36:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2369612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tashilover/pseuds/Tashilover
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jem was jealous of her brother.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Green Eyed Monster

Jem would never say this out loud- and if she did, she would deny you at every turn, you wanker- but she was jealous of Kieren. And for the longest time, she didn't know of what.

In the beginning she thought it was because Kieren was the artist of the family, the creative one. His drawings and paintings were hung all over the house in various stages of improvement. He liked poetry and black and white movies. He was a terrible cook though that didn't stop him from trying. He liked music and wanted to play violin but their parents couldn't afford instruments.

Jem didn't care for all the things Kieren did. She couldn't draw, she liked action movies, she preferred pizza over anything else her mum cooked. She felt... average. She felt like she was going to walk through life without making any real impact upon the world, then die a simple, average death and be forgotten a few years later. Some people didn't mind such a life, but it scared the crap out of her.

When she caught Kieren reading out loud to himself from a Robert Frost book, she walked into his room and asked, "Hey, tell me a poem."

"Really?" He said. "You want to hear a poem?"

"Yeah, numb-nuts. Tell me one."

Kieren was fourteen at this point. His hair was longer, his face was fatter. He would lose it when he turned sixteen. "Yeah, okay," Kieren said, clearing his voice and dramatically held up his book.

Jem sat down on his floor, crossing her legs and preparing herself to listen to something she knew she wouldn't understand.

" _There was once an old man from Nantucket_ ," Kieren began, throwing his voice deep. " _Whose cock was so long he could suck it. He said with a grin, as he wiped off his chin, 'If my ear was a cunt I could fuck it.'_ "

Jem squealed. "Ewwwwww! No, tell me a real one!"

"A real one?" Kieren grinned wickedly. "Okay, here's one. Humphhurm! _A pirate, history relates, was scuffling with some of his mates. When he slipped on a cutlass, which rendered him nutless, and was practically useless on dates._ "

"Oh my god! Another!"

They spent the whole hour exchanging dirty poems and making up a few of their own. Kieren eventually got into trouble when his mum walked by and overheard their conversation. He was forced to wash the dishes for the next month, but whenever Jem handed over a dish to him, he would hum the rhyming scheme quietly under his breath, making her giggle every time.

For an artist Kieren was surprisingly un-pretentious. He didn't like Shakespeare as much as people thought he would, and he preferred contemporary artists over the old masters. If he ever took Jem with him to the city so he could look at the art museums, he always made sure he took her to the dinosaur exhibit too.

It wasn't until the night Jem lost her virginity she realized why she was jealous of K.

The boy's name was John... something. Jem couldn't remember. They were in the woods and patrolling with each other, not really speaking. The last few days the hordes had been unusually quiet and it was putting them all on edge. Was it over or was this simply the calm before the storm?

Seven rotters come stumbling out at one point, arms raised and teeth barred. The next few minutes was the rage of battle, guns blazing, fists cracking against rotting jaws. Between the two of them, they kill six rotters in ten minutes.

The last rotter managed to get the jump on John, smashing him against a tree, clawing at him, its teeth mashing wildly. Jem kicked out the rotter's knee, forcing it to the ground. Ammo gone and blood running high, they proceeded to _stomp_ on its face until its head was nothing more than a bloody pool of skull fragments and brains.

They stumbled back, gasping for air. Looking back, Jem knew it was nothing more than adrenaline which spurred them on rather than previous attraction or lust. John looked over to her, took a step forward and starting kissing her, feasting on her mouth hungrily.

Jem kissed back -poorly- unsure how to respond or if she was doing it right. John didn't notice or didn't care, and kept on kissing her, pushing her back, nearly tripping over the bodies. He hitched her up against a tree and started groping at her chest through her thick jumper.

It... it was okay. A little rough, but okay. He pawed between her legs through her denim, fingers digging in, and _that_ did hurt. She didn't tell him to stop.

The next thing she knew her jeans and pants were pulled down, and before she could blink, he was inside of her. He didn't seem to notice Jem was biting her lip to keep from screaming as his hips moved against hers. When his movements became more erratic, Jem managed to grunt out, "Not inside me."

John pulled out, twisted around, and jerked himself off. Jem swore he was purposely trying to aim at one of the corpses on the forest floor. Freak.

They said nothing as they arranged their clothing back together. They walked back in silence, Jem limping slightly. She never saw John again after that night. He left to go on a different patrol on the other side of the town and was killed when his gun jammed at a critical moment.

Jem went home, took a shower and cleaned all the dirt out from underneath her fingernails. Usually she dressed in the bathroom but was too tired to remember to bring clothes with her. Wrapping a towel around her torso, she limped out to go to her room.

In the hallway as she passed one of Kieren's paintings of a sunrise, Jem suddenly knew.

Kieren was eight when Rick moved in next door. Jem barely remembered it, standing there with him, holding his hand as they watched the movers go in and out of the house. They were equally fascinated by the giant boxes that were brought out, Kieren reading the words like, _Kitchen Items_ scrawled in black pen on the side.

In the middle of it all, Rick came outside, looking for his bed, and spotted them.

Jem remembered how Kieren's hand tightened suddenly, making her look up at her brother in confusion. Kieren's eyes were wide, and when Rick waved at them, Kieren grinned and waved back, happier than Jem has ever seen him.

When Kieren made a decision, there was no arguing with him. He knew he was going to be artist one day. He knew he was never going to wear that ugly blue jumper Aunt Mary made for him for Christmas. And he knew, at that very moment, Rick was his soulmate.

Jem was jealous of his confidence. Jealous of the way he just _knew_. Jealous of the way he could look at someone and decided in that very moment if they were going to be best friends forever.

Jem never had a BFF. Not even before the Rising when such things should've been easy. She was always questioning herself, doubting herself, feeling like a useless twit in the face of such simple decisions. Why was it so hard for her to be friends with girls her age, and yet so easy for Kieren to fall madly in love at first glance?

Was Jem ever going to experience something like that? She felt like she was tripping over her own feet, no matter the direction she was facing.

Kieren had that look again. This time it was aimed at that Disciple guy, Simon.

_It's not fair,_ Jem remembered thinking. _I never once tasted that and you got it twice._


End file.
